2M Q&A - Private Life, Future Of Podcasting & Becoming Religious

Knowing Your Real Friends (00:00:34)

• Kuma asks how to identify real friends.
• The YouTuber realized in his 20s that many of his friends were just drinking partners.
• A good question to ask is whether you enjoy spending time with someone in non-stimulating situations.
• Real friends are those you'd happily spend time with in the most boring situations.

Working Hard Without Results (00:01:40)

• Benjamin asks for tips on working hard and pushing through when results are not immediately visible.
• Gains tend to be slow when starting something new, but they accelerate as one gets better.
• Motivation is crucial to get started, while habit keeps one going.
• Once a routine is established, it becomes harder to stop doing it.
• Use motivation, whether positive or negative, to get started and stay consistent.
• By the time results start coming, the routine should be well-established.

Are Guests Supporting or Challenging Chris? (00:03:28)

• Chris thinks he might be inviting guests who share his views rather than challenging them.
• He is open to having people with different worldviews on the show.
• He tries to bring on people with differing points of view, but it can be difficult to get people who don't agree with him to come on the show.
• He welcomes suggestions for guests who are well-meaning, awesome, interesting, and insightful.

Reaching 1K Vs 2M Subscribers (00:06:05)

• Chris says that reaching 1K subscribers felt really good.
• He agrees with James Smith's idea that all wins feel the same.
• He celebrated reaching 2M subscribers by going to a baseball game with friends.

Chris’s Upcoming Book (00:07:08)

• Chris has signed with Penguin Random House portfolio in the US and Hatchet hotter in the UK.
• The book will be submitted at the end of summer 2023.
• He is not sharing any more information about the book at this time.

Creating Flashy Podcasts (00:07:37)

• Joe Rogan addresses criticism that the increased production value of his podcast, such as the use of a video wall and cinematic effects, takes away from the substance of the wisdom shared by his guests.
• He argues that the changes do not affect the audio quality or the conversations themselves and that they actually enhance the immersive experience for both the guests and the audience.
• Joe Rogan dismisses the criticism that the visual enhancements are a sign of narcissism or ego, emphasizing that the podcast has consistently delivered hundreds of episodes of valuable content even before the production upgrades.

Maximising Growth in Puberty (00:10:20)

• Joe Rogan acknowledges that he is not an expert on maximizing growth during puberty, particularly physical growth.
• He shares his personal experience of being a late bloomer and achieving significant physical growth only in his early twenties after consistent training.

Moving On From Old Friends (00:11:06)

• The transition from old friends to new friends can be a lonely chapter that lasts a long time.
• Trying to find friends during this growth period can be challenging as you may outgrow them quickly.
• Relating to others becomes difficult if you are not moving at the same pace or in the same position as them.
• It is worth holding on during this desert phase as personal growth is valuable.

Talking to Your 18 Year Old Self (00:13:06)

• The most important advice for the speaker's 18-year-old self is to not fear the opinions of others.
• People are often too wrapped up in their own lives to care about others.
• Compromising oneself to be liked or validated by others is a losing battle.

Trying to Feel Feelings (00:14:24)

• Intellectualizing emotions is a protection strategy that creates distance from actually feeling them.
• When explaining feelings, try to avoid rationalizing and instead focus on describing how the situation made you feel, even if it's imprecise.
• Allow yourself to be imprecise when explaining feelings because they are not always clear or obvious.

Afraid of Running Out of Content? (00:17:29)

• As a podcaster, Chris doesn't need to come up with all the content himself, he just needs to find interesting people to interview and ask them questions.
• There are many more people Chris wants to talk to than he has time for, so he needs to hurry up.

Biggest Animal Chris Could Beat in Combat (00:18:05)

• Chris believes he could beat a giant sloth in hand-to-hand combat.
• He is unsure if he could beat a cow, but he wouldn't back himself against an elephant or a horse.

Pushing the Boundaries of Podcasting (00:18:52)

• Thinking about incorporating VR technology, possibly using Parallax to create a moving background.
• Exploring the use of AI tools to enhance audio quality.
• Considering shooting episodes on location for a change of scenery.
• Open to iterating on current methods, such as improving lighting, angles, editing, and color grading.
• Views the LED wall experiment as a step forward without completely deviating from their style.

Keeping Private Life Private (00:20:17)

• Maintains privacy by not publicly discussing personal matters.
• Learned the importance of privacy from Douglas Murray, who advised against sharing personal information due to the risk of it being exploited.
• Believes that navigating relationships, marriage, and family is challenging enough without the added scrutiny of millions of people.
• Uses the example of Logan Paul's engagement and the subsequent public scrutiny as a cautionary tale.
• Prefers to focus on sharing valuable life lessons rather than personal details.
• Finds comfort in the fact that people tend to get distracted by other public figures, allowing him to maintain privacy.

Premiere Feature on YouTube (00:22:17)

• The premiere feature on YouTube allows people to watch pre-recorded videos as if they were live.
• It creates a live chat for viewers to comment and discuss the video as it plays.
• The host doesn't use the premiere feature because they don't want to be bound to a countdown clock and risk technical issues affecting the live chat.

Next UK Tour (00:23:27)

• The host is considering doing a UK tour towards the end of the year.
• They want to have a new show before they tour again to avoid repeating the same content in the same places.
• They may do one big tour covering the UK, US, and Australia.

How to Stop Repeating Mistakes (00:24:04)

• If you keep repeating mistakes, it may be because you haven't truly learned the lessons from them.
• Front-loading pain and pleasure can help motivate you to change your behavior.
• Think about the negative consequences of your current actions and the potential benefits of making a change.
• Imagine the worst-case scenarios if you continue your current behavior and read about others' negative experiences.
• Visualize the positive outcomes and feelings of pride and fulfillment that come with making a change.
• Tony Robbins' book "Awaken the Giant Within" provides a workbook on this concept.

The Hit Piece on Huberman (00:27:48)

• Andrew Huberman's private life became the subject of scrutiny and criticism.
• The podcaster expresses empathy for Huberman and Jett Shetty, who faced public scrutiny for their personal lives.
• The podcaster acknowledges the difficulty of dealing with such criticism and mentions David Goggins as an example of someone who is still affected by negative attention.
• The podcaster suggests that the media may target successful individuals in the self-improvement space.
• Seeking advice from a PR firm is considered, but the podcaster is skeptical about their effectiveness.
• The podcaster emphasizes the importance of privacy and expresses discomfort with excessive public scrutiny.

Going to Church Services (00:30:16)

• The podcaster mentions attending their first American church service on Easter.
• The service was described as a "Rock concert" and different from what they expected.
• The podcaster found value in rituals, community, and self-inquiry during the service.
• They express an interest in understanding why Latin Rite Catholics are a growing religious group in the West.
• The podcaster considers speaking to someone from that group to gain insights into their beliefs and the reasons behind their growth.

Switching From Coffee to Neutonic (00:31:42)

• Mood change is the biggest difference.
• Neutonic helps smooth out anxiety-induced jitters.
• Improved mood makes him want to work harder and longer.
• Associates the taste of Neutonic with feeling good and being productive.

Pre-Bedtime Routine (00:32:50)

• Follows the 321 method:
  • Stop eating 3 hours before bed.
  • Stop drinking 2 hours before bed.
  • Turn off blue light 1 hour before bed.
• Finds it challenging to stay away from blue light for a full hour before bed.
• Takes a shower in the evening as part of his routine.
• Sets Eight Sleep to cool (-3 degrees Celsius).
• Uses Intake nasal strips to improve breathing.
• Reads fiction before bed to avoid worrying thoughts.
• Uses magnesium sleep packs from Momentus every other night.

Did Chris Think He Would Be Successful? (00:34:23)

• Chris didn't believe he would be successful.
• He felt like a loser and still sometimes does.
• He believes everyone feels special because they only truly know themselves.
• Chris's success was not predestined and he stumbled onto it through solitude, consistency, and boneheadedness in his routine.
• It is possible to achieve success even if you don't have much self-belief.

The Future of Podcasting (00:36:48)

• Podcasting could go in many directions.
• There will be a divide between low-production podcasts and high-production podcasts.
• High-quality conversations with engaging guests will be the key to success in podcasting, regardless of the format.

Are We Cooked as a Society? (00:39:08)

• The internet can foster cynicism and negativity.
• Spending time offline and interacting with people who don't spend much time on the internet can provide a more balanced perspective.
• Humans are highly adaptable, as evidenced by stories of resilience in challenging situations.
• It's important to remember that the internet can create a distorted view of society.

Plagiarising Other People’s Thoughts (00:41:18)

• The podcaster acknowledges repurposing other people's content, insights, and quotes.
• Citing the original sources is considered respectful and not plagiarism.
• No one owns the truth, and insights can be shared and built upon.
• The podcaster's role is to curate and present valuable insights, even if they come from others.
• The podcaster aims to integrate these insights into broader conversations and contribute their own ideas.

How To Date Chris (00:43:49)

• The podcaster does not provide a direct answer to the question about dating them.

The Mission Statement of Modern Wisdom (00:44:01)

• The mission statement of the podcast is "understand yourself in the world around you".
• Chris, the host, didn't understand himself or the world and wanted to explore these topics through the podcast.
• The podcast is an outgrowth of Chris's own curiosity and he follows his own interests in choosing topics.
• The common thread throughout all episodes is Chris's desire to understand himself and the world around him.
• Chris prefers to keep his private life private.
• He doesn't share much about his family or personal life on the podcast.
• He believes that his personal life is not relevant to the podcast's mission statement.
• Chris believes that podcasting is still in its early stages and has a lot of potential for growth.
• He sees podcasting as a way to have more in-depth conversations and explore complex topics than other forms of media.
• Chris is excited about the future of podcasting and believes it will continue to grow in popularity.
• Chris was raised in a Christian household but became an atheist in his early 20s.
• He recently started exploring religion again and is open to the possibility of becoming religious again.
• Chris believes that religion can provide a sense of community and meaning in life.

Strongly Disagreeing With Guests (00:45:32)

• Lex Fridman discusses his approach to handling strong disagreements with guests during interviews.
• He mentions a specific instance with Abigail Shrier where he felt discomfort and wanted to intervene to smooth out the conversation.
• Fridman explains that he tries to sit with the discomfort and be curious about the sensation rather than immediately trying to resolve it.
• He describes the physical and emotional sensations he experiences during such moments and emphasizes the importance of curiosity in exploring and understanding these feelings.
• Fridman suggests that curiosity can be a useful tool for managing fear, anxiety, and other uncomfortable emotions.
• He encourages people to sit with their emotions, ask questions, and explore their origins rather than intellectualizing or getting swept away by them.
• Fridman acknowledges that this approach is a work in progress and that he still considers himself a beginner in handling disagreements.

The Guest Selection Process (00:49:31)

• Oliver mentions that it has become easier to get access to most of the guests he wants.
• There are still some top-level guests that require an introduction or prior knowledge of Oliver's work.
• With the increased popularity of the podcast, there are now more people who want to come on the show than Oliver can accommodate.
• Oliver has to triage potential guests based on availability, personal interest, and the overall balance of the show's content.
• Despite the challenges, Oliver enjoys the process and appreciates the network of people who recommend interesting guests.

Will 3 Episodes a Week Continue? (00:51:53)

• The current schedule of 3 episodes a week has been sustainable so far.
• There is no end goal or exit strategy, the host enjoys the freedom and independence of not being owned by a network.
• The workload is heavy and the host needs to make changes to get more help.
• The host wants to be excited about correspondence and interactions, not feel exhausted.
• If the operational load can be reduced, the host would love to do 4 episodes a week to speak to more people.

Modern Wisdom Merch (00:54:35)

• There was a setback in the production of Modern Wisdom merchandise due to a mutiny among the mostly female, mostly West Coast, mostly liberal design team.
• The team objected to working with Chris because of his perceived views, such as being a bigot, misogynist, and xenophobe.
• Chris is considering creating a community for like-minded individuals instead of merchandise, as many people have expressed a desire to connect with others on a similar self-development journey.
• Merchandise will still be produced in the future.

Is There Too Much Competition in Podcasting? (00:56:44)

• Chris addresses the concern about starting a new podcast in a competitive market.
• He argues that starting a podcast should not be about winning or being better than others.
• The focus should be on having conversations with interesting people and personal growth.
• Chris emphasizes that he started his podcast as a side project and it grew organically because he enjoyed it.
• He encourages people to start a podcast if they are passionate about it, regardless of the competition.

Difficult Beliefs to Let Go (00:58:05)

• Struggles to let go of the belief that other people's emotional states are his responsibility.
• Feels like he has to step in and fix any discomfort he causes others.
• Believes he takes on too much responsibility and feels culpable for things he shouldn't be.
• Worries about saying things that make others uncomfortable and castigates himself if he does.
• This pattern is linked to people-pleasing and a lack of safety around making others uncomfortable.

How Far Self-Improvement Should Go (01:00:48)

• Perennial question of balancing self-improvement and being human.
• It's a challenge to find the balance between wanting more and maximizing time, while also accepting that one is not always in control.
• Tactical tips to focus on the positive:
  • Post-it notes around the house to remind oneself of what went well each day.
  • Celebrating successes, both big and small.

Chris’s Last Time at Tup Tup (01:03:44)

• Tup Tup Palace is a nightclub in Newcastle upon Tyne where Chris used to work.
• He spent around 300 nights there in his early 20s, hosting events and dancing.
• His last time there was in November 2021 before he moved to the US.

Favourite Texas Rangers Player (01:04:49)

• Chris's favorite player on the Texas Rangers is Adolis Garcia.
• He admires Garcia's skills and refers to him as a "walking Dominican man mountain home run machine."

Getting Out of Low Moments (01:05:09)

• To overcome low moods without an apparent cause, it's important to address feelings of shame and guilt associated with feeling low and take action, even if it's something simple like getting out of bed and going for a walk.
• Getting a good night's sleep, staying hydrated, exercising, and connecting with friends can help improve mood, as sleep is fundamental to mood regulation, and poor sleep habits can contribute to low moods.
• Identifying patterns and triggers that lead to low moods can help prevent them in the future.
• The speaker discusses various topics during a Q&A session, including their private life, the future of podcasting, and their journey to becoming religious, but specific details about the topics discussed are not provided.

A Modern Wisdom Dating App (01:09:27)

• Chris Williamson promotes a eugenicist cult polycule.
• Considering creating a Modern Wisdom Community, but it might be chaotic.

Go-To Place for Finding Studies (01:10:04)

• Psychology-related research papers:
  • psych.org
  • Psy C e.org
  • cpost.org
  • cpost mailing list
• Aggregator Substacks:
  • Adam Mastroiani
  • Rob Henderson
  • Ginder Bogle
  • Scott Alexander
  • Mary Harr
  • Lis Perry
  • India Constantine
• Psychology Today
• Twitter

All The Different Pill Analogies (01:11:51)

• Red pill:
  • Seeing the world as it is.
  • Understanding intersexual dynamics.
  • Men are disposable.
  • Women are protected.
• Black pill:
  • The actual truth.
  • Genetics determine everything.
  • Only attractive people (5/10 or above) have value.
• White pill:
  • In dating, there is no white pill.
  • In culture, being red pilled is being based and seeing the world for what it is.
  • Being black pilled is nihilistic and hopeless.
  • Being white pilled is hopeful.

Making Friends But Not Being Needy (01:12:50)

• Neediness can be a turnoff, even if it comes across as enthusiasm.
• Aloofness can be alluring as it allows people to fill in the gaps with their own speculation.
• Find a hobby that encapsulates the friendship, such as pickleball, improv, yoga, or watercolor painting.
• This allows you to pre-select people who share similar interests.
• Reddit is not the best place to find friends in real life.
• Try different hobbies for a month to meet new people.
• Attend classes and suggest going for a beer afterward to make friends easily.

Is Everything Women’s Fault? (01:15:45)

• The speaker addresses societal issues and questions raised by viewers, clarifying that not everything can be blamed on women.
• The speaker suggests that women's education, industrialization, and societal support for young men could contribute to addressing declining birth rates and challenges faced by young men.
• The speaker emphasizes the need to address the issues faced by both genders, such as low university attendance and educational achievement for young men, and the double standards in societal preferences for youth and socioeconomic success.
• The speaker highlights the importance of empathy and understanding both genders' struggles, acknowledging the mental health struggles of both men and women.

Best Cheese to Fascinate a Woman (01:22:28)

• A soft cheese on a good quality salted cracker left outside overnight might fascinate a woman.

Which Podcasts Chris Listens to (01:23:09)

• Chris' podcast listening drops when he's busy and only listens to podcasts he needs to prepare for episodes.
• He estimates he listens to around 20-30 hours of content per week, including prep for his show.
• Chris prefers evergreen conversations that he can go back to and listen to later.

Podcast With Lex Fridman (01:24:45)

• Chris plans to have Lex Fridman on his podcast eventually.
• Lex Fridman has been busy and going through a rough time recently.

Dream Feature on a Dating App (01:25:21)

• Chris' dream dating app feature would be a less than 60-second selfie video message as the first message between users.
• This would allow users to learn more about each other's mannerisms, voice, and interests.
• Chris believes this feature would speed up the pace of matching and unmatching on dating apps.

Plans for the Next 10 Years (01:26:30)

• Wants to have a family and become a dad before he's 46.
• Hopes to still be doing the podcast and enjoying life.
• Aims to be emotionally aligned, aware, comfortable in his own skin, happy, and paying it forward.

Being Excited for the Rest of the Year (01:27:46)

• Has some downtime from cinema-related work.
• Excited to write a book, work on Neutonic, and travel more.
• Looking forward to therapy and learning more about himself.

Layne Norton (01:29:09)

• Layne Norton will be coming on the podcast soon to discuss sumo deadlifts.

Plans for More Products Like Neutonic (01:29:28)

• Neutonic was never intended to be a powder or pills.
• Proud of what they've achieved with Neutonic.
• Considering other products but wants to dominate one niche before expanding.
• Excited about product development, positioning, and branding.
• Need to get more Neutonic stock in America due to high demand.

A Debate-Style Roundtable Podcast (01:30:57)

• Considered a roundtable-style debate podcast with three or four guests.
• Wanted to call it "uncommon conversations" and feature diverse guests who would never normally be in the same room together.
• Considered shooting it in a visually appealing way, similar to the Modern Wisdom Cinema episodes, but it would be expensive due to the multiple camera angles needed.
• Prefers one-on-one conversations for the podcast, as it allows for deeper discussions and avoids scheduling complications.
• Might trial some "uncommon conversations" episodes in the future.

Meeting Friends in Early 30s (01:33:00)

• To meet quality male friends in your early 30s, it's important to go to places where you're likely to find the kind of people you want to be friends with.
• Examples of places to meet like-minded people include CrossFit gyms, pickleball courts, SoulCycle or Barry's classes, cycling clubs, and running clubs.
• Avoid purpose-built cocktail mixers and networking events where people are solely focused on making friends, as this can feel inauthentic.
• Instead, bond over shared interests and activities, and friendships will naturally develop.

A Female With Male Role Models (01:34:48)

• Doesn't believe that endocrine differences matter when it comes to role models.
• Thinks there's a lack of female role models at the moment, especially compared to male role models.
• Believes that the lifestyle of a degenerate content creator or self-promoter doesn't appeal to women in the same way it does to men.
• Encourages women to learn from male role models and potentially become female role models themselves.

Full Episodes Disappearing (01:35:54)

• Some full-length episodes have disappeared from YouTube.
• If you notice any missing episodes, please use the contact form on the website to report them.

Optimisations for Growth (01:36:33)

• Improvements made in the past year that led to growth:
  • Thumbnails and titles have improved.
  • Intros were removed.
  • More consistent clips.
  • High-quality guests, including many who are not well-known or have never done podcasts before.
  • Consistency and momentum have helped the channel grow.

Motivation When Nobody Listened (01:38:28)

• Chris continued creating content even when the audience was small because he enjoyed the conversations and found them valuable.
• He advises content creators to make what they are interested in and not to worry about growth, as people will eventually recognize and appreciate their work.
• Following one's instincts and creating authentic content is more effective than trying to reverse engineer what the algorithm or audience wants.

Videos on Spotify (01:40:13)

• Spotify podcasting is currently an audio-first platform.
• Uploading videos to Spotify would require significant operational changes.
• Spotify acquired Megaphone, the hosting platform used by the podcast, but it lacks certain features needed for video uploads.
• There's a need for technological improvements on Spotify's end to enable video uploads.

Learning More About Religion (01:41:46)

• The podcaster was invited to learn more about religious practices as a devout Catholic.
• The podcaster had a negative view of religion while growing up due to the puritanical approach he observed.
• He acknowledges that his perspective has changed and he's now open to learning more about religion.
• The podcaster recognizes the wisdom in traditional religious practices and regrets dismissing them in the past.

Enjoying Youth Whilst Also Being Disciplined (01:43:26)

• Balance disciplined lifestyle (food, exercise, sleep, making money, friends) with enjoying youth.
• Treat things in moderation: have a base of good sleep, food, exercise, and friends, then have periods of intense focus or fun.
• Periodizing is a good approach: have a uniform distribution of fun and hard work across a longer time frame (e.g., 3 months).
• Don't let anxiety about not being perfect hold you back.
• Distorting reality and worrying about small imperfections can be detrimental.
• Trust your feelings and emotions, and follow what feels true for you.

Ending (01:47:18)

• Expresses gratitude to the audience for reaching 2 million subscribers.
• Promises more episodes, including collaborations with popular figures like Ferris, Boran, AA, and Gary Vaynerchuk.
• Invites the audience to learn more about Gary Vaynerchuk on newtonic.com.